Walked into my old work today and felt like crap. Not because I miss working there, but because I wish that they'd miss me more. That's so narcissistic. But I guess I just sort of resent the fact that when I quit I didn't even get a real proper good-bye, no card, nothing. Even though I'd been there for 4.5 years and I guess I thought that counted for something. I don't know, I guess this looming literature review is just making avoid everything to do with it and focus on how shit my life is.
So cue the my-life-sucks rant. And go.
I do hate the fact that I've never really had a serious boyfriend. It makes me feel so immature. I don't mind waiting to find someone who actually means a lot to me, but I feel like whenever I'm in a conversation with people talking about sex or boyfriends or whatever, not only do I not fit in because I don't have anything to say, but I feel really silly about the whole conversation. Like a 14-yr-old in sex ed or something.
Secondly, I wish I was really smart. Or really good at something. I wish I had a thing that sort of defines who I am. Something that makes me recognizable besides being 'the twin'. But I'm not really very good at anything. I don't even want to do psychology anymore.
This was a poorly-worded post.
1) people have wished to be you, including myself (and still wouldn't mind it, if i get to be that funny/pretty/stylish/healthy!)
ReplyDelete2) some people are so unappreciative/smelly. they will go nowhere in life.
3) realising your forte (& boyfriends and sex) will come in time, a lot of people are in the same boat for sure.
oh, and i see no fault in the wording!!
next time i'm in a conversation about sex and boys with people i don't know well, i'm just gonna make shit up and say i've had 3 boyfriends, had sex with 10 boys/lads/MEN and they'll be in awe of me.
ReplyDelete